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Woman mum-shamed after furious husband reveals she wanted to go on solo-trip to Europe

Woman mum-shamed after furious husband reveals she wanted to go on solo-trip to Europe

It's sparked a heated debate online

It's normal for couples to bicker from time to time but, for the most part, they can usually a find way to come together in agreement when it comes to big things.

Well, this was far from the case for one husband who was left absolutely furious after his wife told him she wanted to go on month-long solo trip to Europe.

The bloke took to Reddit to share a little more context behind the situation and exactly why he didn't agree with her in the slightest.

He titled the lengthy post: "My postpartum wife wants to leave our baby to go on a vacation to Europe for a month and I don't agree with her."

The man, 32, started out by explaining he and his wife, who is 30, have been together for four years now, and decided to both split their workload '50:50' to care for their child - who is a 16-month-old toddler by the way and not a baby.

He also added: "I acknowledge how it is more physically challenging for her with the postpartum phase and constant (regressive now) breastfeeding (our daughter cluster feeds and doesn't like the bottle very much so that's that).

"I am also very pro-therapy, so regardless of any evaluations, I encouraged her to attend a few sessions and she and her therapist both agree that she does not have PPD.

"I am letting everyone know this because I really want to be able to find a way to talk sense into her without putting all of it on depression."

The pair got in a 'huge fight' after she told him she was 'tired' of 'feeling like a mum'.
PixelsEffect / Getty Images

Sharing some more context, the father revealed that he and his wife had a 'huge fight' after she told him she was 'tired' of 'feeling like a mum', and therefore wanted to take some time away - four weeks exactly - with a friend who is based in Europe.

He continued: "Her reasoning for going for four weeks is that she gets to 'earn' it after childbirth and 1.5 years of being a mum.

"She also says she has her own savings and how she always dreamt of exploring Europe so this is her chance and she wants her identity back."

Totally fair enough, that, in my opinion.

I mean - you have just birthed an entire human after carrying it around for nine months and having it feed off your for 16 more.

However, the husband disagreed with his wife and told her that 'priorities are bound to change', and that 'she cannot expect to have a single life back'.

"I would happily step up and take on her share of childcare if she wanted to do a weekend trip or a spa day and would fully support that," he went on.

"Apparently that's not enough for her.

"I told her if she wants to really do something about her savings, it would be great if WE could do something maybe as a couple or a family TOGETHER because I also deserve a break as much as she does.

The mum had been breastfeeding the child for 16 months.
Cavan Images / Getty Images

"I told her how it's selfish she is choosing to spend her savings entirely on herself when I nearly exhausted all MY personal savings on a large family expense."

Not only that, but the man also 'shamed' his wife after telling her he couldn't 'fathom the idea of a mum wanting to be away from her toddler for nearly a month'.

Explaining to his wife that it was 'making things difficult' for him because he would have to be 'both Mum and Dad' to the baby, the Reddit user revealed: "I told her I cannot stay in a relationship with someone who cannot compromise with me on this.

"She started crying and told me she wants to feel like herself again, and I told her she definitely can do something this weekend as well but her propositions are highly unrealistic."

He concluded: "It seems that she does not want to accept things as they are.

"I suggested maybe she could get therapy and got told 'I won't accept the unacceptable' and how I was condescending her into therapy.

"Can someone please share what I should say to her?"

Many defended the mum's decision to want to take some time to enjoy a trip away.
Adene Sanchez / Getty Images

People seemed to be totally divided in the comments, with half seemingly defending the husband: "She needs to find a compromise that doesn’t involve pinning all the duties on you for a whole month.

"I’d be absolutely livid and absolutely questioning my marriage if my husband told me he was going on a month long vacation and leaving me to deal with everything."

Others, however, were totally on the wife's side: "It sounds like she needs to have a little of her autonomy back."



"It's not about Europe. It's about burnout," pointed out a final Reddit user. "She sounds at the end of her rope. Nine months of pregnancy and 16 months and counting of breastfeeding and now a toddler who wants to cluster feed on a diminishing supply... she must feel like she'll never get her body back.

"She has the patience of a saint, I would've shut down the milk bar. Four weeks in Europe is just a fixation, not the real issue."

They continued: "Even if she were to go, the stressors that drove her away would be waiting. It's probably time to make some quality of life decisions at home... how to get her more help, start weaning, etc. and plan a shorter trip away to recharge."

Featured Image Credit: Skynesher/Greg Bajor/Getty Images

Topics: Parenting, Pregnancy, Real Life, Sex and Relationships, Travel, Mental Health, Health, Reddit