The idea of a zombie apocalypse terrifies most of us to our very core.
It's the end of the world, your friends and family are turning into monsters in front of your very eyes - not a nice concept. At all.
However, there are some optimists in the world. Not all of us are as negative as I am.
Drs Chuck and Jo-Ann Bird, relationship councellors and board-certified clinical sexologists, have put together a zombie apocalypse sex toy survival kit and it's adorable and horrifying in equal measures.
First of all, they suggest the Nick Hawk GIGOLO Tie Me Up & Tease Me Kit
Writing on their blog, they explain: "It comes with 20.75 feet of rope, a blind fold, weighted stainless steel kegel balls and a feather tickler. So, you can use the rope to do lots of survival things such as repel down a cliff, make a booby trap, and hold things together when needed. You can use the blind fold to help you get the much needed sleep. You can use the weighted kegel balls as ammo in sling shot and the feather tickler as a paint brush to send messages to other people (beats getting your hand all bloody!). And when things are quiet, you can still get a little kinky with your partner."
Next, the Scandal Ball Gag and Scandal Collar with Leash
Credit: Seriously Sensual
They explain: "If you want to be like Michonne in The Walking Dead and have pet zombies, you will definitely want these in your survival kit. Okay, not only does the ball gag and collar with leash help you with erotic play but these can be used to stop your pet zombies from getting away and biting you!"
Waterproof Glow-In-The-Dark Stud
"This is a 7 inch, waterproof, multi-speed vibrating dildo that also glows in the dark. You definitely need a light source in the zombie apocalypse! So, you can light up the night and have lots of fun!! Plus, it's a great way to keep your batteries dry. Extra bonus!"
Anyone else find this absolutely hilarious?
If anyone ever goes in the drawers by your bed by accident, remember: It's a zombie survival kit and nothing more.
Featured Image Credit: AMC/sextoys247